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what_the_fork_man: (Dead AF)
[personal profile] what_the_fork_man
[community profile] secondchancesnet
what_the_fork_man: (Dead AF)
[personal profile] what_the_fork_man
[community profile] secondchancesnet

This can't be Facebook. I'm banned from Facebook.....

what_the_fork_man: (Dead AF)
[personal profile] what_the_fork_man
[community profile] secondchancesnet
Really? After 8000 hell reboots, I end up in New York? Forking Shirtballs. I got the 411 from your hologram. Don't know who you are Tony Stark, but it would be a LOT easier to pay attention to your hologirl if she was wearing a thong, or maybe set it to music, Just a suggestion,

Also, to the jerk with the Walkman, Your sideburns aren't helping you.

Are there really aliens here? Inquiring minds want to know.

Anyone seen a super serious guy in a mailman uniform? A chick with legs up to THERE? A guy from Jacksonville, Florida?

Anyone? Bueller?

Comments

fell_in_love: (smirk)
Sep. 26th, 2020 12:39 am (UTC)

Re: Gamora and Eleanor

Nope, this is actually my first time on Terra.

Is this anything like the Star Trek mini-skirt my boyfriend tried to convince me was combat gear?
what_the_fork_man: (Prom Queen)
Sep. 26th, 2020 03:19 am (UTC)

Gamora and Eleanor

You want someone to show you around? I'm new to New York but whatevs. Earth is earth, man Unless you're a demon which will so blow

Add a mailbag to that outfit and we're golden! So about your boyfriend, what's he like? Most guys like to watch, just you know, throwing it out there.
fell_in_love: (I can't blush)
Sep. 26th, 2020 03:51 am (UTC)

Gamora and Eleanor

That would be great.

Honestly, he's legendary at the kind of situation it sounds like you're suggesting. I don't share though.

My father-in-law bought a pleasure-bot on Contraxia I'm sure Peter would be happy to get out of storage, if you're interested in that sort of thing?
what_the_fork_man: (I got nothin')
Sep. 26th, 2020 04:07 am (UTC)

Gamora and Eleanor

Girl. Trust me. All men think they are legendary. It's how they're made, it's like when you go to a wet t-shirt contest. You know there will be boobs, water and shirts. Everybody thinks theirs are special, but honestly it all comes to water, shirts and jigglypoufs. Just part of the show, man.

Yeah, so about that. Uh....not interested in sharing your man, Especially if he is the sideburned pissypants who hasn't figured out AirPods.. Seriously tell him he can watch. Betcha he'll be down here so fast, you'll think he has jet boots or some shit.

Nah, I bought a vibrator off of Craigslist once, never could get the smell of bacon off it, ever since then I stick with new out of the box. It's just how I roll.
fell_in_love: (calm)
Sep. 26th, 2020 04:49 am (UTC)

Re: Gamora and Eleanor

I mean, he does actually have jet boots..
what_the_fork_man: (Squee)
Sep. 26th, 2020 07:15 am (UTC)

Gamora and Eleanor

So it's a date?
fell_in_love: (smolder)
Sep. 26th, 2020 10:32 pm (UTC)

Gamora and Eleanor

Only one problem with this plan. I am exclusively attracted to half-celestial men with sick dance moves. It's a curse.
what_the_fork_man: (Default)
Sep. 26th, 2020 11:06 pm (UTC)

Re: Gamora and Eleanor

Man that sucks. Have you thought about treatment?